elegantwoman.org

https://elegantwoman.org

Recently, my idea of elegance has yet evolved again. Being more home-bound, I've had to work harder to get inspiration for elegant living. It is easy to get disheartened because it is a bit more challenging to express elegance and what it used to mean to me. With less socializing & travel & just going out and about - it was less about manners & etiquette, discovery of art & culture & the lovely outfits one gets to wear when going to the theatre. In fact, I look down at what I'm wearing now and wrinkle my nose in mild disapproval. It is a red old t-shirt and not exactly becoming. How do I continue to live elegantly, or rather, how do I continue to aspire to be a better version of myself (elegance is just the style of growth I prefer)? I felt bored without inspiration.In my bid for inspiration about other matters, I found some. Since I am homebound, I felt annoyed at areas in my home that felt unpleasant to look at. I love a beautiful home but I'm not that great of a housekeeper (those who have been following my blog would probably already know this!) In an effort to get motivation to sort out the unruly spots, I picked up a good Goodbye, Things and... unexpectedly, it gave me a fresh perspective of elegance! You see, while I completely agree that an elegant mind is essential for elegant living (see link for previous blog post). This book gave me more practical ways where I could free my mind and gain more elegance in my thoughts.My greatest takeaway from that book was that The things you surround yourself with speak to you. We all know less is more, and how we should declutter and that it's good for the environment. But the author Fumio Sasaki brought a new understanding - that the things in our home are constantly sending a message. And that we are experiencing information overload.He writes that even with the rise of smart gadgets & high tech, our brains are not meant to receive all this information. The human brain is pretty much the same since 50, 200 years ago. It is just not wired to consume and handle the current volume. We are constantly bombarded with information everywhere we go, and while we can't control the outside environment, we can do something about it in the home. This information overload came from 2 areas, physical & mental clutter. Physical clutter - things are always sending a message. The author illustrates this by saying that expensive clothes in his closet made him feel bad because he was not utilising them. Everything that lay around the house are constantly sending out messages to our brain... asking you why it hasn't been used, or put away or dusted. While he pretty much got rid of everything and is probably an extreme minimalist, I thought about the messages I would like to receive from the things in my house!I look around and love my black enamel piano (though I guess he is right in the sense that it is calling out to me to play more). I love the art that hangs on my wall, a couple of photo frames and I love my plants. I love my couch, where I look forward to lounging on every evening to read and relax. I want my house to send me messages that I can smile at, and to inspire me for more elegant living!But yes, there are absolutely areas of my home that I detest, and that what is what I've been working on. Mental clutter arises from physical & intangible thingsApart from physical items, he also writes about the amount of intangible things that we have to manage in modern life. For instance, he writes about how he got rid of all his bank accounts except one. This struck a huge chord for me as I work in small business. People who are in a similar situation as I am or is self-employed will understand - we have to wear many hats. We have to create maintain the email list, write newsletters, post social media accounts (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, Snapchat & lately Tik tok), do photoshoots, answer emails, approve comments, apart from the physical work such as supply chain, logistics, production, packaging, design etc. I can totally relate, there is why I am able to only occasionally write articles, newsletters and post on Instagram.But on a personal note, do you find yourself managing a lot more too? How different and simpler life was in the 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s! There are so many fun things but so many things to manage! Such as: Multiple email accounts - we have to check, delete, reply, unsubscribe... even if we try our best, everything that you sign up for needs an email account!Some of us have multiple phones/devices - one for work and one for homeIf you have social media, there are comments to look at, direct messages, stories & posts, new stickers & filters to exploreMultiple bank, investment accounts, the internet, bills, news, media & entertainment accounts etc There's a thing for every thing! You have charge it, update it blah blah blahIt is almost crazy, the crazy times we live in. Maybe that is why we are all wired up, stressed out and those are the reasons why we can't sleep at night.A new curated dream of eleganceWell... I don't have the answers, but it gave me a new dream - on how I would like to live. I intend to not only work on creating beautiful spaces in my home (turning areas that I don't find pleasing to pleasing). I'm also shutting down projects that have been lingering because I no longer want them to exist in my mental space.I have to come to terms with loss and waste. And for extra things, I hope to donate them and pray that someone else will find them useful.Unlike the author, I will make exceptions for myself. I am already pretty minimal generally speaking but I do enjoy my things! For example, I can be absolutely minimal in make up, shoes and clothes but I love bags and will try to keep my hoarding tendencies to a minimum. I also will get rid of most of my past by photographing/archiving them and get rid of my someday I will start this project archives. I've already deleted most of my emails and by the end of the year, delete my old email accounts so that they will not haunt me!I will get rid of most of my homewear and wear the same cotton tees everyday. I will get rid of anything garish or anything too outstanding unless it is an art piece. I will no longer subscribe to any rewards program!I will also reduce the amount of bank accounts.I will take the time to solidify my publishing accounts... the world & internet platforms have changed so much I can't keep up. I've switched this website 3-4 times just to comply with Google! I'm sorry to those of you who have experienced delay in getting some of the digital books/courses due to all my internet problems. Greatest appreciation for your patience. So how about the things I've already been doing?I set out only two pairs of shoes for daily use - one for fine weather, and the other for wet weather. I rotate between two pairs of pants, with a small selection of every day tops.I wear my skirts on the weekends. I find it easier to settle into a routine, and I have to adjust my routines according to my goal. My routines cover personal hygiene, tidying up of my home, meals, shopping, working, checking email and reading. I focus on beautifying decluttering one area each week.I have full access to my phone all day and do laundry every other day or when it is exceptionally sunny. I think I'll have to set a boundary for using my phone...hmm :)Of course, my routines can be improved and now that I'm in semi-lockdown, I have to include a routine for exercise. Also, in recent months, I've been actively seeking out nature. My nature-loving dad would be so proud of me (he's no longer with us). Thus in conclusion, I'm glad that I've added to my 'repertoire for elegant living'. Elegance is truly not just about simplifying & developing exquisite taste - but to be also RUTHLESS in limiting the information we consume.Thanks for reading & going on this journey with me! - E

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